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i sold my soul to anthropology
07 April 2003 - 11:03 am

i'm done i'm done i'm done! (i posted the exam questions yesterday.) i've never been so happy in my entire life! just after i wrote that i realized i wrote the same thing last month when donna got a job. oh well, at least i'm happy. i've been up since 7 am yesterday, that's 28 hours. donna stayed up with me all night and faithfully proofread my essays about 4 times. she is the grammar/spelling goddess. i took the bus to school and turned it in 5 minutes early. i'm not going to my classes. i'm too exhausted. but i went to the bookstore and bought myself a reward-- Nietzsche's beyond good and evil. oh yes. i love nietzsche.

i think i avoided some bizarre anthropology major initiation hazing ritual. walking down the back stairs to turn it in, i saw some senior anthro majors putting on strange costumes and planning an ambush. i was too tired to be attacked, so i got out of there as quickly as possible.

so i'm taking a day off. how nice it is. i can't really sleep anyway, too many uppers. when i lie down my heart beats too fast. i'm eating easter candy donna's parents sent her. i'm free! never again will i have to think about model-building categories! well, unless i have to retake part of it. there's definitely a chance of that.

yesterday was very strange. we had all these things from our past revisit us. first, there was the dave's cologne incident (previous entry). the cologne did not disperse, so for the rest of the day i was in the "last summer" mindset. (it still hasn't gone away). second, m. and nicole came over. we haven't seen them in a month or so, and i always associate them with when dave was here and the summer. third, i bought some coke, for the first time in a long time, to help me stay up all night. that combined with the cologne was so incredibly surreal. smells. fourth, a friend called whom i hadn't heard from in forever, also associated with last summer. i guess it was the last summer memorial day. i want to keep spraying that cologne everywhere, though, it makes me feel so unreal.

i've been listening to calexico nonstop for the past 3 days, and i mean nonstop, since i also haven't left the house for 3 days, until this morning. i am very underfed. buying food was not high priority in my exam-taking frenzy. my favorite jeans (the only pants i ever wear), that jade gave me, that used to be the tightest thing i'd ever worn in public, are now falling off and the bottoms drag in the mud. they stupidly don't have belt loops, so i walked along looking like a dork holding my pantlegs out of puddles. it's raining raining raining raining. oh my fucking god. i think i'm losing my mind. love, becky


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